Happy Father's Day

Happy Father’s Day to all of you dads!  There are three very special dads I want to talk about today—My husband, my dad and my father-in-law.

Tim is such an awesome Daddy!!  Our children are very blessed to call him Dad.  He is a man who is consistent, loyal and dependable.  He’s a provider and a hard worker in the home.  He’s always been a hands-on husband and dad.  He never hesitated to help out around the house or change diapers (even if he had a bandana to cover his nose).  He had the tenderness to dress the girlies as babies in their Sunday dresses complete with tights and tiny shoes.  He showed up to church more than one Sunday with white spit up on his suit and never seemed to mind.  He can paint their fingernails and put their hair up in pony tails!  Yet he also has the strength and energy to handle a boy like he did with our sweet son, Brandon!  He enjoyed throwing a football, kicking the soccer ball, hitting baseballs and turning any space into a wrestling mat!  I must say though, he’s not all fun and play.  He’s a strict Daddy!  He does not put up with attitude, rolling eyes, sassing, laziness, bickering or foolishness.  He has a wonderful balance of fun and play while holding his God-given role as the leader of this home.  His children all adore him because of it!  I love you so much, Tim!

My daddy was also wonderful.  Growing up Dad was strict yet loving.  I had no problem distinguishing absolute right from absolute wrong.  I knew what was expected of me and Dad never compromised and I am so thankful for that security.  We never asked, “Are we going to church today?”  It was a given.  As a young child I recall asking Daddy, “What do you want me to be when I grow up?” He answered, “I want you to be whatever God wants you to be.”  I hope Dad’s proud of me, because I’ve tried to be the mom and wife that God has wanted me to be while balancing my work/ministry in finances and management.  Dad never got annoyed with me as I followed him around building homes, running to the hardware store, washing our family cars, or changing the oil.  He taught me the names of all his tools, what they do and how to use them.   I recall yapping his ear off the whole time.  It was my special time alone with my Daddy and I always enjoyed it.  Dad’s a generous man!  If I have a generous bone in my body it came from my Dad.  He loves giving to missionaries and to others he sees that have needs.  He is perhaps our biggest fan  and supporter when it has come to our 2 adoptions from Ukraine. He has a big heart and loves others deeply.  He raised me to be independent and discern God’s will for my life.  I recall as a teenager when I was involved with the wrong guy Dad saying, “I know you are probably going to hate me for saying this, but for what it’s worth, I think he is all wrong for you.” I never hated Daddy for caring enough to say something to me when I was headed in the wrong direction.  Dad was right.  God had someone FAR BETTER for me.  He’s an awesome Grandpa and “Pops” (as Brandon affectionately called him).  He enjoys spending time with his grandkids and they adore him for it.  I love my Daddy!

I’m also thankful for Tim’s dad.  Tim has all the wonderful qualities he does partly because of his father’s solid leadership.  Dad Kerr is a godly man who has served in missions overseas in Thailand, Jordan, Lebanon and many other countries and is currently serving in the US.  He was involved in all 4 of children’s lives while growing up in sports, in ministry and around the home.  He dedicated a lot of time to teaching them about God’s Word.  He is still involved very much in his adult children’s lives and prays for each one of them daily and their families.  They know they can go to him if they need a wise ear to listen.  He is also a kind-hearted, generous man who freely gives of himself, his talents and his time.  He is a very active “BeBe” to his many grandkids.  They all love their BeBe very much.

 I am so grateful to have THREE great men and fathers in my life.  I also have Tim’s grandfather (aka Fadie), brother, his and my uncles, etc. that are also godly and solid, hardworking men.  I recognize that some reading this blog do not even have one godly father or man in their lives, but my prayers is that most of you do have this blessing.  I do not take for granted this leadership and I pray our children recognize the incredible gift they have as well.  God bless each of you.  Happy Father’s Day!

Tim at the lake with Brandon

Tim on a "Daddy Date" with Katie.  She wanted to go ice skating with Daddy.

Kylie loving on Daddy.

Daddy stealing a kiss for Haley's 7th birthday

My Daddy and I this past Easter

Tim and his Dad on Thanksgiving this past year

Cheekens

His teasing laughing face

You can't see it very well in these photos below because I snapped them with my phone while driving, but this chicken truck we pass every day still makes me smile. I can still clearly hear Brandon's devious laugh, "I eatz you cheeken. You my supper." He did that with the sole intention of hearing his sisters scream, "No!!!! We don't eat them!!"  I sure do miss my boy and his crazy teasing. 

Is Christ Enough?

I’ve been asked a question a few times after the death of Brandon.  I’ve recently learned that other family members have been asked the same question.  Honestly, I hate this question.  Don’t misunderstand, I am not taking offense to the question because the Bible says that Christians are not supposed to be easily offended (I Thes. 13:5).  However, I will explain why I hate it so much and also my answer to the question. 

The question is this: Is Christ Enough for you? My answer is no.  This is my answer whether or not it is the “right” answer or the godliest answer.  It is my most honest and transparent answer.  I am afraid if more people who have lost loved ones were honest, they would answer the same way that I did, for we were created to want and to need other human beings.  I believe by loving others, we are demonstrating our love and gratitude for our Creator.

Back in the beginning of Creation in Genesis 2:18 we see that God said, “It is not good for man to be alone.”  Why did God say that?  Adam had all the beauty and enjoyment of Eden.  He even had continual fellowship with only his Creator God.  Was God not good enough for Adam even before the Fall of Man?

In Luke we are commanded to “Love the Lord your God” with all our heart, soul and minds AND “Love your neighbors” (Luke 10:27).  That is God giving us the commandment to love others.

In Philippians 1:3-7, Paul expresses his love and thankfulness for his fellow brethren.  He prays for them.  He expresses that he longs for them and he misses them.  He even states, “It is right for me to feel this way about you all, because I hold you in my heart, for you are all partakers with me in grace.”

Here is another great example from Paul in I Thessalonians 2:17.  Paul writes, “We were torn away, for a short time in person, not in heart, we endeavored the more eagerly and with great desire to see you face to face.” In verse 19 he even says that in addition to the hope and joy of having Christ return, he is excited that other believers will return with Him!  Verse 20 says, “For you (other believers) are our glory and joy.”  People gave Paul a great deal of joy!

I think part of the reason we suffer the loss of loved ones on this earth is so that we gain a more heavenly mindset.  I have never looked as forward to the New Earth and my home with my Heavenly Father as I have since I lost my son.  I have always been excited, but I have not studied Heaven, thought about it as often and really looked forward to Heaven as much as I have in the last four months. 

As far as me hating the question, it is simply because I do not believe it is not a fair question to ask.  It is almost contemptuous to ask a grieving individual “Is Christ enough to bring you joy or is He not?”  Only Adam had the opportunity to live with only God and no other human beings.  God created us with the desire to have other human beings.  I believe God finds joy when we purely enjoy His creatures that He created in His own image.  He created us with a mind, will and emotion to long for those we are not with and in His perfect plan in the longing of loved ones we are pointed back to Christ.  I, along with Paul, are “longing for the coming of the Lord AND ALL HIS SAINTS” (I Thes. 3:13). The Bible says in difficult times and in times where we might be tempted to sway in our faith to “encourage one another with these words” (I Thes 4:18).

In conclusion, I do not think it is shameful or wrong to long for loved ones.  I do not think it is idolatry to love other human beings.  In fact, it is wrong if we do not love others for we were commanded to love and fellowship with other believers.  I believe that God created others for our enjoyment and to bring us a taste of the companionship we will experience with other believers in Heaven along with our Heavenly Father.