He Was There

This evening we went to our friends' house for a going away party for some of our closer friends.  All the other families that were there had children under the age of 3.  Nevertheless, all of our older kids were super good and put up with screaming and crying, having toys taken away from them and being bashed over the head with toy hammers, etc.  I was quite proud of them.

It was fun to watch Brandon play with the toys designed for babies and toddlers.  He was seeing them for the very first time and very fascinated with the lights and the sounds.  In some sense, it is like having a toddler again discovering the world for the first time.  The excitement is very much the same though he is 11 years old.  We take for granted all that America has to offer.  From the time babies are born they are presented with colorful stimulation.  I’m not sure why we, Americans, feel babies and children need so much stuff, but everyone does it. 

Seeing him play with baby toys with such innocent excitement really made me have a bit of a pity party for myself.  I have missed out on so much of his life.  I missed his first bath.  I missed his first smile.  I missed his first steps.  I missed his first birthday (actually, I missed all 11).  I wonder if there was anyone that cared enough to observe any of his firsts.  Did anyone notice when he took off crawling for the first time?  Or was he just another kid on the move?

(Sigh). I don’t mean to seem so down today.  I am so grateful we get to enjoy his life now.  One thing that helps ease the hurts of this mother’s heart is knowing that God was there.  God predestined this precious boy to join our family.  He knows when Brandon smiled first.  It is God that preserved the joy in his heart!  God kept him safe and sustained his life until we came for him.  I hope that one day when Brandon learns English well enough I can share about the God who created him.  As for now, I will just praise God every day for bringing Brandon into our lives.  He is the greatest son on the face of the earth and I am so honored to be his mother. For I know whom I have believed and I am convinced that He is able to guard what I have entrusted to Him until that day.